I've been through all my classes at least once now. I'm taking...
Greek 2
Theological Exposition (The Theology of Preaching)
Intro To Philosophy
Intro To Music
Daniel and Revelation
I must say this semester will bring the most reading of any semester before it. I should have expected that once I entered my now Junior year.
I'm convinced Greek 2 will be a wonderful class for many reasons. I have a better professor this semester. He does devotions from his own translations of New Testament Texts and has applications for us today. In these he also reviews Greek Grammar where it comes up. He then actually has structured helpful lectures on the material which is a change from last semester. I now also have Mounce's Grammar and the CD that comes with it (which has short audio/powerpoint lectures of its own) to aid my study. I think I will have an easier time in Greek this semester because of the review over break and the better quality class. I'm looking forward to it for sure. The only challenge to this class outside of the nature of learning a language will be the personality of the professor. He teaches as if he's preaching with unction every class. He has a certain commanding presence about him. My introversion is likely going to squirm and freeze when he calls on me to the point where I won't be able to think straight in the limited amount of time he gives to answer a question. May God help me develop courage and clarity of thought during this class.
Theological Exposition is not what I expected. The professor (who is also the department chair) decided to restructure the class this semester. It was originally a class on how to prepare topical messages that emphasized a theological theme. I heard students in the past preached on hell and other doctrines. Now the class could be better titled "The Theology of Preaching." Now it's emphasis is more so on thoughtfully working through the discipline of preaching through heavy reading and class discussion. In fact I expect it will be my most reading intensive class next to Dan/Rev. We will read assigned articles on preaching, answer questions, and meet to discuss. Then near the end of the class we will be comparing the sermons of two preachers at a time and discussing them. the majority of the grade will fall upon the reading. One of the most interesting parts of this class is that it's only 10 students in a small room with rectangular table that faces inward. It will be like having a home Bible study with the professor on a much more personal level. I'm excited about this format, but I hope I have time to thoughtfully interact with this class as I would like and most benefit from.
Philosophy looks like it will be interesting. Apparently I have the best professor among student consensus and he seems to be a funny guy too. The reading is still somewhat a mystery as I don't know how much we'll read of this one huge book we have. I really hope the reading for that class is not as daunting as the other major two. One of our books is by R.C. Sproul and I've neevr read any of his stuff so I'm looking forward to that.
Music class is the one I frankly am least concerned about. Our first class session was today and while it seemed enjoyable for what it was, I really hope the workload is minimal. I was overjoyed to hear that he required NO textbooks... what does that mean? NO READING! He almsot gave the impression that much of what we'd be doing is listening to music... I'm up for that. We even get to have a time of prayer and song together... amen to that.
Dan/Rev looks like the class will give me what I wanted in choosing it as one of my 2 Bible electives. I wanted a better grasp on Eschatology. With all the personal study and reading this class will require I'm sure I'll be happy with it when I'm finished (in more ways than one). Other than that... it is what it is.
I continue to attempt to find better employment here in Chicago. It's an everpresent struggle to trust God even though my immediate needs are provided for. God is gracious and so good. I heard the call center on campus had 12 positions open this semester so I emailed the contact person and then called her to leave a message (bear in mind this is the second day of school). The grocery store I've been working at is expecting a call from me by the end of the week to give my new availability and start next week so my job search would have to begin and end this week. I decide to walk over to the appropriate building and I see approx. 10 students there practicing to work for the call center. My heart stirred with a combination of sadness and shock as the woman in charge approached me. I told her I'd contacted her about working for the call center and hadn't heard form her. She said she'd email back tonight but that she was in training now. I left the building in utter defeat as I did that one morning when I was passed up for the job with campus radio. As I walked, I tossed back and forth with God confused about His will. When I reached the library to begin my long task of heavy reading I sat down first to pray and acknowledge Him and His soveriegnty and recognize that even by what I can see.. I would likely get through this semester and possibly the next one. I go to eat dinner and return to my room to receive an email from one of the only people that I would not expect to hear from considering the circumstances. More than that it was an email that could only be by the hand of God and therefore bring Him the most glory. Who was it? The very manager of Moody Radio who forgot me over last summer and hired someone else. He wants an interview and I'm happy to give him one!
Lord, why do I doubt You? Lord, why do You remain so faithful to me?
I'm also looking forward to being on leadership for Student Outreach this semester. I still don't know if I'll be doing the training for the upcoming nights but my mind has already started working as to how I would approach it if I did. It will be good to get back out on the streets preaching the gospel again. May the Lord use me in whatever capacity I contribute to the team and His Commission!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
How Was Your Break?
This is a question I and most of my fellow students will be asked repeatedly over the next few weeks. I wasn't sure what to expect when entering this past break. I can ultimately it was a combination of busy, relaxing, and full of awkwardness... as usual I suppose. It was awkward because it seems the longer I spend more time here at college than at home, this place and these people become more of a home and family to me than my actual one. There are a number of reasons for this, but it's primarily just the time spent. I found myself taking longer to re-adjust or perhaps not adjusting at all when I went to church and especially to work over break. It's amazing to almost watch the lives of people pass by as you're away for months at a time. I saw new people at church, new looks, maturity, and all kinds of things. I wasn't able or at least didn't pursue evangelism as strongly as I could have. I was going to go the last night, but made a promise to spend time with someone before leaving.
Much of my break wa spent studying Greek to make up for last semester. I went through a lot of Mounce's book page by page... which I recommend wholeheartedly. Still have catching up to do tomorrow with that. I spent too much time time staying up late watching TV. I also had time to meet with a few people, but not all that I wanted to sadly. Last night I was over at an old friend's house up till 2am talking about studying Hebrew and speaking in tongues with him and his dad.
I got a good check from the grandparents for CHRISTmas that primarily went to school. I did pick up a few gifts for myself with it. Found a couple CDs I'd wanted for $6 each and a Hebrew Grammar book for half price that I couldn't pass up. My best friend also got me some workout shoes for this semester. Please Lord let me be disciplined enough to get back into a regular workout routine. This is not a New Year's Resolution. Also had 2 separate friends get married and one get engaged over break. It allowed me to ponder a bit on my status and what that meant to me. I was reminded that yes I am single but that God doesn't stop being sovereign.
Well... time for dinner!
Much of my break wa spent studying Greek to make up for last semester. I went through a lot of Mounce's book page by page... which I recommend wholeheartedly. Still have catching up to do tomorrow with that. I spent too much time time staying up late watching TV. I also had time to meet with a few people, but not all that I wanted to sadly. Last night I was over at an old friend's house up till 2am talking about studying Hebrew and speaking in tongues with him and his dad.
I got a good check from the grandparents for CHRISTmas that primarily went to school. I did pick up a few gifts for myself with it. Found a couple CDs I'd wanted for $6 each and a Hebrew Grammar book for half price that I couldn't pass up. My best friend also got me some workout shoes for this semester. Please Lord let me be disciplined enough to get back into a regular workout routine. This is not a New Year's Resolution. Also had 2 separate friends get married and one get engaged over break. It allowed me to ponder a bit on my status and what that meant to me. I was reminded that yes I am single but that God doesn't stop being sovereign.
Well... time for dinner!
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Updates, Disciplemaking, Balcony Hecklers, and more
It's been some time since I've written. It seems the urge comes during times like these. I have a paper due in two days where I still have about 6 of the OT prophetical books to summarize and here I sit. I really do miss journaling. I've had so much happen that I could write a book.
Not long ago we had a seminary fair on campus and as I consider where I would go if the Lord wills, I continue to lean toward The Master's Seminary (http://www.tms.edu/). As I focus on Biblical Exposition here at Moody, I believe my graduate work should be focused on Biblical Counseling. As a pastor I want to be able to preach well and be a shepherd well and while I know much will continue to come with experience, I believe a focus on counseling next would be appropriate. I'm confident now more than ever that God would have me in a pastoral role. While I don't know where or in what capacity, I believe God has continued to affirm this. This morning in our retirement home ministry at Concord Place, it hit me that a women in the small congregation our group has really grown in her walk through the Lord using our ministry. A woman who used to interrupt the preacher and correct the worship team after every service has become a woman who asks us to thank God for all the He provides during prayer time, who helps pick up the hymnbooks after the service, and who told us she shared Christ with someone this past week. She may not be perfect, but neither are we.
A woman who believed God spoke to her through a message I gave felt that she needed to reach out with the gospel to others in her retirement home community and handed out almost 100 tracts in one week. If one woman who can barely move in a wheelchair can do that... what does that say about us? We had the opportunity recently to visit some of the residents in their rooms. Norma was the woman who used the tracts. I love her so much. Her and her roommate Algie are the funniest. Algie was a secretary at Moody for about 40 years. Norma once asked us what we thought of Joel Osteen. She said she just "itches" every time he comes on and she wished he would "just open the Bible and study it." She said Algie needed to exercise or she would just sit there and "get FAT." We've really enjoyed these people. I'll be praying about whether or not God wants me to stay in that ministry next semester. Currently I plan to switch to Student Outreach. I know the leadership will need some help next semester and I really miss being out on the frontlines seeking the lost.
Last night about 9 of us went out to the Chicago Festival of Lights in the usual general area the group goes to witness. I hadn't preached in some time so my voice has been a bit deep today. It was pretty cold, but we still spent about 1 1/2 hours out there. Once Matthew and I started preaching the crowds came. We had plenty of teens listening and even a group from a local church who came over to encourage us. For the first time I was heckled from the balcony of a building. They kept yelling "shut up!" To which I responded that some people will shut up on judgment day because their knees will be bowing and tongues confessing that Jesus Christ is Lord. The hecklers helped further the gospel as they often do because the tracts were flooding out of the hands of the students. Apparently each open air sermon provided opportunities for excellent conversations as well. Matthew is coming along well. I began mentoring him last semester and helping him channel the zeal. I remember the first time he ever stood on a stool and read a passage of Scripture out loud to open up for me... he still had some mild mockers even though he was reading Scripture. God's Word brings many reactions... may it bring a reaction of change in people's hearts. But yeah, it looks like Matthew has found his proper volume, anunciates his words well, and even had an engaging and interesting springboard. He tells stories well. Here's one of the videos from that night. Sorry we didn't get the hecklers on film...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guOxVwTd1Is
Meanwhile Nick who I've been mentoring when I return home to Texas is following the same path I did a couple years ago. He's started burning copies of Hell's Best Secret and visiting local churches to hand them out to the youth groups and pastors. Nick is still in high school and he often calls me to tell of his evangelistic efforts in the school. I praise God so much for him. Often I wish I was saved back in high school, but in a way... Nick is reaching those I never got a chance to reach. While we're talking about different high schools, I rejoice that God saves people into such legally closed environments to be witnesses for His truth.
The past couple weeks God has also continued to draw me closer to Himself. My devotional life is better than what it was and God has been providing for me. It's been so difficult to have faith. The other day I called my dad who reminded me of a life insurance policy I'd forgotten I had that he suggested I cash out to help pay for school. I'm continuing to pray about that as it seems to have come at just the time I was beginning to get worried about what the future would hold. The numbers currently say that I will run out of money by the end of next semester. This insurance money may be the Lord's provision. As the economy seems to be not doing well and my has to pay the employees with his credit card, I have to trust God that He will provide for my school payments if He wants me to be here. I'll be applying at a couple campus jobs for next semester that pay more than what I'm currently making. We'll see what God does.
Tonight a few of us from my Intro level evangelism and discipleship class did a project. It was a "Servant Evangelism" project. The professor has been better than I expected in that he makes points like he doesn't really like calling the project Servant Evangelism, because the point of it is not necessarily evangelism. On the same note, when we interact with lost people... I can't help but remember Paul's words in 1 Cor. 9:16, "...woe to me if I do not preach the gospel!" As a buddy of mine on campus says, "if we focus on Jesus we will begin to have His heart for the lost." While I'm not promoting legalistic motivations that force us every single time we're within 4 feet of someone to attempt to witness to them, I do think if we're going out to interact with the lost and letting them know in any way that we are Christians... we should not leave Christs' gospel out of our encounter. I must admit it broke my heart to hear that we shouldn't hand out tracts just because we didn't plan to stick around and have a conversation to go along with them. The nature of what we were doing and the places to which we went weren't all good for conversations. I'm just horrified at the thought that at the chance to either share the gospel in some format or not share it at all... that we would choose to not share it at all. I handed out two tracts, but I can't help but wonder how many of those restaurant employees will taste those freshly baked chocolate chip cookies from Moody Bible Institute students and still one day taste spiritual death in a lake of fire. Oh Lord may we see the harvest, get up off the porch, and be the laborers you have called us to be.
Not long ago we had a seminary fair on campus and as I consider where I would go if the Lord wills, I continue to lean toward The Master's Seminary (http://www.tms.edu/). As I focus on Biblical Exposition here at Moody, I believe my graduate work should be focused on Biblical Counseling. As a pastor I want to be able to preach well and be a shepherd well and while I know much will continue to come with experience, I believe a focus on counseling next would be appropriate. I'm confident now more than ever that God would have me in a pastoral role. While I don't know where or in what capacity, I believe God has continued to affirm this. This morning in our retirement home ministry at Concord Place, it hit me that a women in the small congregation our group has really grown in her walk through the Lord using our ministry. A woman who used to interrupt the preacher and correct the worship team after every service has become a woman who asks us to thank God for all the He provides during prayer time, who helps pick up the hymnbooks after the service, and who told us she shared Christ with someone this past week. She may not be perfect, but neither are we.
A woman who believed God spoke to her through a message I gave felt that she needed to reach out with the gospel to others in her retirement home community and handed out almost 100 tracts in one week. If one woman who can barely move in a wheelchair can do that... what does that say about us? We had the opportunity recently to visit some of the residents in their rooms. Norma was the woman who used the tracts. I love her so much. Her and her roommate Algie are the funniest. Algie was a secretary at Moody for about 40 years. Norma once asked us what we thought of Joel Osteen. She said she just "itches" every time he comes on and she wished he would "just open the Bible and study it." She said Algie needed to exercise or she would just sit there and "get FAT." We've really enjoyed these people. I'll be praying about whether or not God wants me to stay in that ministry next semester. Currently I plan to switch to Student Outreach. I know the leadership will need some help next semester and I really miss being out on the frontlines seeking the lost.
Last night about 9 of us went out to the Chicago Festival of Lights in the usual general area the group goes to witness. I hadn't preached in some time so my voice has been a bit deep today. It was pretty cold, but we still spent about 1 1/2 hours out there. Once Matthew and I started preaching the crowds came. We had plenty of teens listening and even a group from a local church who came over to encourage us. For the first time I was heckled from the balcony of a building. They kept yelling "shut up!" To which I responded that some people will shut up on judgment day because their knees will be bowing and tongues confessing that Jesus Christ is Lord. The hecklers helped further the gospel as they often do because the tracts were flooding out of the hands of the students. Apparently each open air sermon provided opportunities for excellent conversations as well. Matthew is coming along well. I began mentoring him last semester and helping him channel the zeal. I remember the first time he ever stood on a stool and read a passage of Scripture out loud to open up for me... he still had some mild mockers even though he was reading Scripture. God's Word brings many reactions... may it bring a reaction of change in people's hearts. But yeah, it looks like Matthew has found his proper volume, anunciates his words well, and even had an engaging and interesting springboard. He tells stories well. Here's one of the videos from that night. Sorry we didn't get the hecklers on film...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guOxVwTd1Is
Meanwhile Nick who I've been mentoring when I return home to Texas is following the same path I did a couple years ago. He's started burning copies of Hell's Best Secret and visiting local churches to hand them out to the youth groups and pastors. Nick is still in high school and he often calls me to tell of his evangelistic efforts in the school. I praise God so much for him. Often I wish I was saved back in high school, but in a way... Nick is reaching those I never got a chance to reach. While we're talking about different high schools, I rejoice that God saves people into such legally closed environments to be witnesses for His truth.
The past couple weeks God has also continued to draw me closer to Himself. My devotional life is better than what it was and God has been providing for me. It's been so difficult to have faith. The other day I called my dad who reminded me of a life insurance policy I'd forgotten I had that he suggested I cash out to help pay for school. I'm continuing to pray about that as it seems to have come at just the time I was beginning to get worried about what the future would hold. The numbers currently say that I will run out of money by the end of next semester. This insurance money may be the Lord's provision. As the economy seems to be not doing well and my has to pay the employees with his credit card, I have to trust God that He will provide for my school payments if He wants me to be here. I'll be applying at a couple campus jobs for next semester that pay more than what I'm currently making. We'll see what God does.
Tonight a few of us from my Intro level evangelism and discipleship class did a project. It was a "Servant Evangelism" project. The professor has been better than I expected in that he makes points like he doesn't really like calling the project Servant Evangelism, because the point of it is not necessarily evangelism. On the same note, when we interact with lost people... I can't help but remember Paul's words in 1 Cor. 9:16, "...woe to me if I do not preach the gospel!" As a buddy of mine on campus says, "if we focus on Jesus we will begin to have His heart for the lost." While I'm not promoting legalistic motivations that force us every single time we're within 4 feet of someone to attempt to witness to them, I do think if we're going out to interact with the lost and letting them know in any way that we are Christians... we should not leave Christs' gospel out of our encounter. I must admit it broke my heart to hear that we shouldn't hand out tracts just because we didn't plan to stick around and have a conversation to go along with them. The nature of what we were doing and the places to which we went weren't all good for conversations. I'm just horrified at the thought that at the chance to either share the gospel in some format or not share it at all... that we would choose to not share it at all. I handed out two tracts, but I can't help but wonder how many of those restaurant employees will taste those freshly baked chocolate chip cookies from Moody Bible Institute students and still one day taste spiritual death in a lake of fire. Oh Lord may we see the harvest, get up off the porch, and be the laborers you have called us to be.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Life as I know it. Calling Confirmed?
God has taught me much this semester already. It's hard to believe some students are already studying for midterm exams. Recently a friend was stopped as they realized they've been here at school for nearly a year already. God has shown me my heart in more ways than one. It's said of the missionary David Brainerd that he was so depressed and so discouraged that his flesh came out to the point that his "self-pre-occupation was so intense that his Indian charges and their problems figured as little more than intrusions." In other words, those who he was ministering to became more of an annoyance than anything else. God has shown me here that my brothers and sisters around me have become the same way way... particularly when I'v been overwhlemed. God has so convicted me of that in these few short months. My roommate has asked for accountability, friendships are not what they were, and my mental noise would sometimes be dangerous if spoken aloud. The Lord is good however and gracious.
Classes are going as well as they can I suppose, but never to my desire. The jury is still out on whether or not all the work I did over the summer and in the first two weeks of the semester was really worth the burnout it caused. Things seem to be hit and miss. Much of my is spent on greek only for the majority of my grades to return quite low. It's not easy to remind myself that grades aren't everything. I WANT to be effective in future ministry and do well in school. I'm confident in my Greek exam grade though... whenever the prof is able to grade it. The preaching class from here out will be nothing but students preaching and us evaluating. I've made plans to open up some room the two weeks prior to my sermon to work hard on it. We'll see what happens however. Next week is Missions Conference. I've outlined which sessions most interest me. As I continue to consider how exactly god may desire to use me in future ministry, I've come to a realization of sorts. My personality is not prone to like new environments and change. Nor is it easy for me to reserve judgment on different ways of doing things. These two factors would require a major heart change and very specific growth for me to consider a future in Pastoral Missions as I was praying about not long ago. Bearing that in mind, at this moment I'm leaving that to God and have chosen to lean more toward local Pastoral work as I believe I was originally led to do.
One of the clearest affirmations in this direction came as a fellow student in my practical ministry preaching at the retirement home said to me, "I could see you pastoring a church. I don't know that I could've said that at the beginning of last semester." I struggle to remain faithful to God in ways. I struggle with my thoughts in all directions. I struggle with trusting Him sacrificially. It's difficult to step off the cliff of life into the chasm of God's sovereignty. I remember now however it's each time I have done that... that God has really moved in tangible and clear ways. We had a seminary fair here yesterday where about 40 schools were represented. As I considered what they offered and spoke to many of them, I'm looking at an M.A. in Biblical Counseling. Why? Because if I'm able through my experience here to accurately handle the Word of God, another major element I'll need is to be able to shepherd those God places under me. These will be real people with real needs and real hurts that at present I can't say I'm able to confidently address. I want to be a pastor who can fulfill the full sense of "pastor" to God's people. I want to see people grow.
Evangelism has been short here but as often as I can. The 3rd Season of Way of The Master came in the mail Monday and I'm holding a viewing night for the first two episodes tomorrow at 9pm. I'll be praying God uses it to plant seeds for active and intentional evangelism on this campus. Is revival too much to ask for? Last night we had a security guard tell us we needed a permit to preach on the sidewalk in front of a mall. He said the city passed an ordinance that could lead to a $500 fine. I told him the police officers on the horses didn't seem to have a problem with us... he said they and the ones on foot were different. I was laughing rather hard inside... only to later find out that two them walked in front of us in the middle of my preaching. We ignored him and God was good to us with no further disruptions.
Work has been alright. I'm in the transition period. This week I decided to take it easy. I've worked one day catering and next day to work is Saturday. It turns out I accidentially bought a woman's tuxedo jacket. Needless to say, I have the right one now. I can't call to ask for more days until Monday. But it's Missions conference next week... do I want any more days?
Honest thoughts:
God is good, but I face the daily struggle as to if I'm really giving Him my best. Am I giving those around me my best? What will come of this impending financial crisis on our country? How will that affect the financial stability of Moody and my father's financial support?
Classes are going as well as they can I suppose, but never to my desire. The jury is still out on whether or not all the work I did over the summer and in the first two weeks of the semester was really worth the burnout it caused. Things seem to be hit and miss. Much of my is spent on greek only for the majority of my grades to return quite low. It's not easy to remind myself that grades aren't everything. I WANT to be effective in future ministry and do well in school. I'm confident in my Greek exam grade though... whenever the prof is able to grade it. The preaching class from here out will be nothing but students preaching and us evaluating. I've made plans to open up some room the two weeks prior to my sermon to work hard on it. We'll see what happens however. Next week is Missions Conference. I've outlined which sessions most interest me. As I continue to consider how exactly god may desire to use me in future ministry, I've come to a realization of sorts. My personality is not prone to like new environments and change. Nor is it easy for me to reserve judgment on different ways of doing things. These two factors would require a major heart change and very specific growth for me to consider a future in Pastoral Missions as I was praying about not long ago. Bearing that in mind, at this moment I'm leaving that to God and have chosen to lean more toward local Pastoral work as I believe I was originally led to do.
One of the clearest affirmations in this direction came as a fellow student in my practical ministry preaching at the retirement home said to me, "I could see you pastoring a church. I don't know that I could've said that at the beginning of last semester." I struggle to remain faithful to God in ways. I struggle with my thoughts in all directions. I struggle with trusting Him sacrificially. It's difficult to step off the cliff of life into the chasm of God's sovereignty. I remember now however it's each time I have done that... that God has really moved in tangible and clear ways. We had a seminary fair here yesterday where about 40 schools were represented. As I considered what they offered and spoke to many of them, I'm looking at an M.A. in Biblical Counseling. Why? Because if I'm able through my experience here to accurately handle the Word of God, another major element I'll need is to be able to shepherd those God places under me. These will be real people with real needs and real hurts that at present I can't say I'm able to confidently address. I want to be a pastor who can fulfill the full sense of "pastor" to God's people. I want to see people grow.
Evangelism has been short here but as often as I can. The 3rd Season of Way of The Master came in the mail Monday and I'm holding a viewing night for the first two episodes tomorrow at 9pm. I'll be praying God uses it to plant seeds for active and intentional evangelism on this campus. Is revival too much to ask for? Last night we had a security guard tell us we needed a permit to preach on the sidewalk in front of a mall. He said the city passed an ordinance that could lead to a $500 fine. I told him the police officers on the horses didn't seem to have a problem with us... he said they and the ones on foot were different. I was laughing rather hard inside... only to later find out that two them walked in front of us in the middle of my preaching. We ignored him and God was good to us with no further disruptions.
Work has been alright. I'm in the transition period. This week I decided to take it easy. I've worked one day catering and next day to work is Saturday. It turns out I accidentially bought a woman's tuxedo jacket. Needless to say, I have the right one now. I can't call to ask for more days until Monday. But it's Missions conference next week... do I want any more days?
Honest thoughts:
God is good, but I face the daily struggle as to if I'm really giving Him my best. Am I giving those around me my best? What will come of this impending financial crisis on our country? How will that affect the financial stability of Moody and my father's financial support?
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Burnout
Spent too much time shopping yesterday for a work uniform. Spent too much time socializing last night. I've had less than 5 hours of sleep. Skipped chapel. Skipped Old Testament. I have a major paper due Thursday... of which I have about 30% done. I have a Greek quiz in under 2 hours... of which I'm hardly confident. I work tonight. Got a short paper due Wednesday morning. Lord... I'm silent before you. Nothing I seem to do is enough. I can't stay up like I used to. I can't push the envelope like before. I'm drowning. I don't even know what a time of rest looks like anymore. I am a zombie.
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