Familiar Thoughts

Working with Tom Thumb/Safeway/Dominick's for a number of years one of the main things that was beaten into my head was customer service. One of the primary features of this is to greet every customer within hearing distance. We actually can get "talked to" if we miss greeting a customer. I remember a few times that I greeted an older gentleman as he came through the department. Very often people answer a greeting with "fine, doing well, great, good" and the like. This man wanted to shake things up. He wanted to have a little fun with people who greeted him. His standard answer was "terrible!" with a smile. I liked that man. It occurred to me today that my Melancholy comes out even when I'm asked, "How are you?" My standard answer is "not too bad." Saying that looks similar to "I'm doing bad, but not that bad." So my tentative goal is to use words that are honest, yet a bit more positive and reflective of what I'm really trying to communicate....lol. 

I just got back from a rap concert on campus put on by students here at Moody. I continue to be amazed at how God uses people and culture to bring glory to Himself. Since the DVD is only $5 I'm planning to pick one up and show friends back home. When the Bible and rap come together awesome things happen. I can see why Paul Washer speaks at many Christian rap concerts supporting those like Ambassador, Cross Movement, Lecrae, 116 Clique, and others. I was reminded of who I am tonight at this concert though...lol. I'm just not the type to sway, bounce, and wave my arm to the music. I think I identify with John Piper who was once compared to Mark Driscoll in a panel discussion. Driscoll is said to go to comedy clubs and I think when Piper was asked why he doesn't go to things like that his reply echoed my heart at its core. He said, "John Piper is weak." Such a conscience (while not always) is commonly attached to those who are more reserved and bookwormish. Maybe I made that connection more easily in my head than in writing... hopefully you see somewhat where I'm going. My point is that personalities can be telling in certain circumstances. Speaking of Piper I hear an interview recently with he and Mark Dever about his calling to the pastorate. Piper actually went from a professor at a Bible college to a pastor when it usually goes the opposite direction. He fundamentally said God made it impossible in his own heart for him to remain a professor. It was a wonderful little 6 minute story.

God is so good. As I returned back from Spring Break weeks ago I was told that my Chicago job couldn't afford to take me back and that I should look elsewhere. So I've been out of work and trying to focus on my studies a bit more and attend school events. I've applied to a few jobs for next semester, but it doesn't seem promising to find a job that will let me leave for summer in about 6 weeks and then come back. So I've been trying to trust God. He has paid for the rest of my semester, the summer classes, and all of next semester. Beyond that, our house sold back home and my dad will now be able to continue helping me pay for school. I really hope those numbers are not where my confidence is found. Lord I must look only to you!

As I try to keep so many of those I know in prayer I continue to pray for my future wife. The Lord has been humbling me lately in revealing my own inadequacy and my continued need for His divine intervention and ordering of circumstances. If it was up to me I would ruin everything...lol. I can hardly have a meaningful friendship with a woman, who knows what would happen if I actually fell for one at this stage in my life. With His help I've been able to guard my heart appropriately and hopefully be an encouragement and a sober mind to the few sisters I know. Through all this I'm reminded (with a half smile) of all those times growing up that I could easily build friendships and be there for the women in my daily life when they needed to talk, but the curse of the hopeless romantic basketcase is that the answer to his heart's desire remains in the unknown. For the Christian this unknown is not unknown, but in the capable hands of a sovereign God. While I love ministering to my sisters in Christ a chunk of me continues looking into the heavens with one eye and wondering, "when will it be my turn, Lord?" I enjoy the song, "While I'm Waiting" by John Waller from the movie, Fireproof. Like the song says I will worship and take every step in obedience... I will serve Him.... while I'm waiting. There's little point in spending too much time being concerned with something God has not chosen to do yet.