Updates and Rambling

Today and tomorrow is the re-grand opening of my store at work. This week I've ended with just over 42 hours. My manager will likely hit 65 before it's all over. It's been a tough week. I probably spoke too much at times and kept my mouth shut when I should have spoken up at other times. There were just "too many chiefs and not enough indians" in that place. Either way, after tomorrow it will all be over and I'm thankful for that. I'm also thankful that I've almost fully recovered from the cold that began this week.

Today was supposed to be the day Moody called back with a housing answer, yet I got no call. I'll call them Monday morning. Through that and this past week, I feel at peace still. I rest with God. I have a final next week... may I rest with Him then as well. I've asked for less hours at work because of it.

I'm not sure what else to talk about. I can only say I have what seems to be an inexpressable desire to praise God and lift Him up at this time. I can echo with Jeremy Camp... "Give Me Jesus." I can "sing alleluia" with Jennifer Knapp. I can only wonder and marvel at what God has for me in the coming months. Where will I be? I ponder... if He keeps me here, I can save more money and if He takes me to Chicago, it will be more of a test of faith. I only hope that whatever course I'm placed upon, that I may make my life a prayer to Him.

My mind occasionally still wonders where I will be in 4 years or so. I look at the lives of those I once loved moving on and I smile at times shared... good and bad. I smile at the things that God brings us to grow us, mold us, shape us, mature us, test us, and refine the wandering hearts of His children. I can appreciate subtle sanctification. I can appreciate the fact that sometimes... for some of us... the only way to learn how to make good decisions is to have made bad ones. What else can we do but recognize we're precious and beloved, yet still pieces on His chessboard. I'm ok with that, because if I were King... my kingdom would have forsaken me long ago.

I am nothing before Him. I am small. I am but a servant. I pray that I will never forget this. I want to be His hands. I want to be His feet. I must go where He sends me.