Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Summer Fun?

Well summer is here and there's no rest for the weary Bible student. I've been working full time since my return and thankfully sales are so high at work they can afford to give me my hours and sometimes more, while still having both the managers and a fourth person working in the same department. Nearly all of us are working full time too. I worked a straight 12 hour day yesterday so I could end up with 40 hours by the end of the week. It's been tough work physically. I doubt I could handle a second job as I'd considered before leaving the campus. It would have been a less physical job... like a cashier somewhere or something, but I'm already pretty tired as it is.

I've been out witnessing once since I've returned. It was nice to see the guys again and even some new faces from a nearby Bible college and their street preaching team. I got to take Nick out with me that week. He's a 17 year old from my church who's been a believer for less than a year. He really enjoyed his experience and his thinking was stirred quite a bit. He said he got see another side of Christianity. He hadn't seen people being yelled at for preaching the gospel... until that night. Sadly the heckler's threats and reaction cause Nick's father to disallow him from returning with me. I can understand parental concern, however the area is littered with police of whom I have the direct phone number... not to mention the many Christian adults out there. Please pray for that situation. I believe this was a tremendous growing experience for Nick. It's also been a growing experience for me as I interact with and walk alongside a new believer.

I'm making progress in my reading of the Old Testament to prep for taking the survey class next semester. I'm in the middle of Joshua. Hopefully I can reach the end in the next 3 months before I head back to school. it sounds like an easy task... if that's all I did with my free time. I've also undertaken a study of biblical Greek to prepare for that class. I'm pretty confident with the alphabet and transliteration and I'm moving into pronunciation, grammar terms, etc. I've been starting to study with a guy from church who put down his Greek studies a while back and found this as an opportunity to begin again.

I've also endeavored to spend time with my best friend... studying and talking. He really has needed the accountability as I do I in some areas. I've reached a kind of dilemma though in my counsel with him. It's been difficult to address the issues at hand in a new way. Questions enter my mind... what else is there to say? is "something new" the answer at all? how can I best use our time together? am I truly serving my friend as a brother in Christ? How can I do that effectively? I had a brief talk with another friend today that helped answer soem of these questions... and it's interesting how these things are often much simpler than we make them.

May the Lord guide this summer and I grow in His grace.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Fresh Thoughts

Usually when I speak quickly... I insert my foot even faster. Taking that risk, I write now... the thoughts must come out and be prayed over. We just finished our Studying and Teaching the Bible class session where my group taught. I thank the Lord people aren't in my head so often. I overanalyze, I worry, I criticize, I play more scenerios in my head in 20 minutes than moviemakers probably could come up with in a year. This is my struggle. I think too much. In my head I so wrongly beat myself up and become discouraged. My mind says, "I know my heart is beyond what I just said. I know the fire is boiling beyond the words I just said. I know my relationship with You Lord. I know what we have and what You've shown and taught me. I know how You've grown me. I can do better than this. Where's the disconnect, Lord? Where's the barrier so I can be done with this and move on to more effective growth and ability in communicating Your Word?"

I know He may have other purposes for this. I also know as a principle "His ways are not our ways." All my life I've struggled to get it out. My life is a pattern of almosts. My introversion I feel so often has plagued me and perhaps those I've led and taught in the Word. I get so discouraged inside. Often as I am seeing today... that discouragement is not warranted. However, it's still real. Real enough for me to admit it to you. I freely admit I am a Biblical Exposition major who struggles greatly in confidence while doing what I'm here to do.

In typing these words the Spirit reminds me of those who have gone before me... from this wonderful school and beyond. I'm reminded of Tony Evans who is terrified to speak with people because of his introversion and yet preaches with the undeniable anointing power of the Holy Spirit. I'm reminded of John Wesley who when he preached barely lifted his arm while his co-hort George Whitefield preached with his entire body. I'm reminded of the fact that my confidence should never be in my own "abilities," but in God's calling, God's Word, and God Himself. Where is my confidence? Hopefully not in me! Hopefully not in other people's opinions!

Paul didn't come with excellency of speech or clever words of wisdom, yet few would argue the power his preaching. I praise God. I praise Him. I have 5 more preaching classes and a Homiletical Jury to preach before until I graduate. I have a long way to go... who am I if I get discouraged in the core class and haven't even reached the actual preaching classes?

Thursday, April 17, 2008

"It's only the beginning..."

When I graduated from Tarrant County College, I think I remember my best friends' father saying something like congratulations... to which I replied, "It's only the beginning..." As I plan ahead (and I always do), I find that God's grace and strength will be the only things that carry me through. I'm learning so much and growing so much, but as Pastor James Ford said in chapel around 2 hours ago to the young men of the student body, we aren't here to study the Bible... we're here to know Him. Looking in front of me I have a list of prayers for the mornings. There are about 10 things and people to pray about at the moment. I've been able to read the Word in the mornings. One thing I miss is my own time of worship before God. I rememebr the sweet mornings of no class until 10am at TCC when I could spend 45 minutes praising and worshipping God in song each morning.

David Livingstone was one the most known pioneer missionaries to Africa. He was trained as a preacher. When he got up to preach for the first time, we're told he opened up the Scripture and began reading his passage. While reading he abruptly stops and says, "Friends, I have forgotten all I had to say" and leaves.

I have moments like that more than most people know. As I watch my own development as a preacher, I currently struggle with one thing particular. I notice that when it comes to preaching the gospel on the frontlines of the streets where common people stand... the intensity and urgency in my voice are clear. However, as I stand to the pulpit and teach believers... I am conversational and calm. I look at preachers like John Hagee (while I don't agree with him on all he teaches) and so many others, I desire to preach with an intensity like that to God's people. I am searching for the wall between or how to bridge the gap between my evangelistic preaching and the teaching of the Word. In that vain, I've begun to pray that God would grow me in His wisdom as a preacher and teacher. It seemed like novel idea.

Next semester's schedule has changed. Here's the new one...

Old Testament Survey (Lecture) TuTh 11:00AM - 12:50PM TBA W. Marty 4.00
Greek Grammar I (Lecture) MTuWF 1:00PM - 1:50PM TBA E. Gray 4.00
Introduction to Disciplemaking (Lecture) MW 9:00AM - 9:50AM TBA C. Craigen 2.00
Christian Missions (Lecture) MWF 11:00AM - 11:50AM TBA S. Naaman 3.00
Communication of Biblical Truth (Lecture) TuTh 8:00AM - 9:15AM TBA J. Koessler 3.00

Interpretation: EEEEEKKK!

This summer will prove to be busy itself. My current plan: Work 40 hours a week and possibly pick up a second job, read the Old Testament to prep for the class in Fall, begin to study Greek to prep for Fall, look at and do observations for my fall sermons at the retirement home. I'm reminded of the proverb that says, "if you falter in times of trouble, how small is your strength."

In light of all I've written just now and the time I've used, I say... "LET'S DO THIS!"

Saturday, April 12, 2008

We come to a close... already!?

It's hard to believe we have less than a month before semester finals. Where did the time go? I've built friendships, learned more of how to study the Word of God and present the clear doctrines of the Bible even clearer, not to mention had the opportunity to minister in more ways than one: Street preaching (of course), teaching and preaching in leading a worship service with a team, helping a guy on the floor with classwork, and (hopefully) being a good brother to the ladies on our sister floor... while I can joke a bit too far at times. What was it the Bible said about the tongue? Oh yeah, it's "set on fire by hell" (James 3:6).

I'm planning (if they let me) to go with the same practical ministry next semester. I got to check out a few others and visit their booths yesterday though. A few of the groups stood out to me for one reason or another. The ones I was considering were the 1. Male prostitution outreach or 2. The Juvenile Detention center ministry to teens. Sound scary? AMEN! Their eternity and the lack of influence in their lives sounds more scary to me. I'm continuing to pray also about the idea of Missions Pastor. I've yet to have any clear direction, but don't expect to at this time. Then again, since when does God act based upon our expectations? Anyway, I've been picking up the flyers and info from church planting and missions organizations that visit the school as I'm able. I'm continuing to pray for God's will to be done. As life unfolds His will is revealed and I can only praise Him because I was not asking for my own will.

It's been a challenge to maintain a job and schoolwork and while I wish I'd have done better on the quizzes, I think things are working out alright. It's strange to think I only took 6 hours of classes in community college while the working the same amount of hours because I thought it was too much. I suppose I was leading a campus ministry and doing street ministry each week, but somethign tells me I could have stepped it up. Now I take 15 hours of classes, work about 22 hours a week, prepare and teach every Sunday morning, and occasionally go out street preachign with the team. It's interesting what we can do through the strength of Christ and our willingness to serve Him. In chapel recently a man who I later found out was a fellow street preacher in essence told his hearers to "stop being babies" and called it endureology. It was a convicting message to say the least. On another note, because my roommate is leaving this semester and getting married... one of the other Pastoral majors and fellow street proclaimer has offered to room with me. We'll be able to move the "Pastoral Studies" sign to our new door.

I'm excited about next semester as well. I'm amping up my credits and planning to get some of the work done for Old Testament over the summer. That should free up enough time to balance things out... hopefully. I already called my job back home and they said I have a job waiting for me when I return for summer. I'm still considering taking up a waiter job with that or something.

prayer:
-Missions Pastor?
-Retirement home ministry
-The Roman Catholic lay minister who stopped to hear my entire message on the street
-Homework and Endurance
-Continued Financial Provision
-Setting aside a meaningful amount of personal time with God in Bible college

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Tongues, Hermeneutics, and Calling

I'm on the tail end of my break here in Texas. I'll get a good number of hours in due to a few tragedies. My job rehired me in 10 minutes and I worked the same day, thanks to God. The tendency or temptation would be to say "look how good I am, they wanted me back and took me back in no time!" No, the glory and provision goes to God. He wanted me back here for a reason. One thing I was able to do was cover a good amount of spiritual ground with most of the newer deli employees. That itself might have been God's purpose. Since I left I've wanted to witness to the guy who is a former Mormon in practice, but still is one in doctrine. He could be affectionately called a "backslidden Mormon." I also have had the opportunity to do some evangelism in the area and get some reading and study done for classes.

I preached at my old park and a guy from Albertsons I used to work with was there jogging to hear the gospel. Another day at the park, two Mormon missionaries (ages 20 and 21) were there. As I walked by with my Bible one of them came after me on his bike to talk. His immediate response to my Bible was that they believe it AND the Book of Mormon was the Word of God. We all three sat down at a bench and had a civil conversation. I admitted that would probably not read their testament and pray to see if it's true (I already know the God of truth and His written Word). I did say I had some questions however. They told me salvation is by faith in the sacrifice of Christ after all that we can do. I read to them Ephesians 2:8-9. They didn't know how to harmonize works and faith, but just said they work together somehow. We ended on a friendly note and I told them this discussion of faith and works for salvation has eternal ramifications and made it clear that we disagreed on that. They however told me that I had the Holy Spirit just as they did. They said my demeanor showed them I was saved. They said all churches have some of the truth... the Mormons just have the rest of it. Afterward I thought "wow, at least the JW's have the eternal punishment and judgment side of things right!" It almost seems as if even the Mormons are becoming somewhat postmodern!!

The Lord also gave me the courage to preach to the kids at the skate park again. I haven't done that in over a year. It was rather full too. I preached th entire message. Of course, kids were kids though. They cussed a lot and mocked a little. One of them lit up a cigarette. I ended saying that I would lay a small stack of my business cards on the slab of sidewalk I was standing (just outside the fence of the park). They could email any questions they may have and I'd answer them more clearly than I would in person. I also said I would sit on the nearby bench for the following 10 minutes to talk individually if they wanted. I did these things and afterward realized that they convey an important message that motivates me to consider this principle more. By putting the cards out in the open on the OTHER SIDE of the fence... the kids would have to walk out and around to pick up a card in front of all the rest of their friends and skateboarders. Furthermore, if they wanted to talk to me in person, they would have had to walk even further out in the open and in front of everyone. They would have had to risk the humuliation of their peers. Needless to say pride or fear prevented anyone from talk with me, but one kid did take a card. Pray for him. I could hear them talking as I sat there. Some were saying "go ask him _____." Others were saying "are you defending him?!" Please pray for those kids.

I also got to preach in good ole downtown ft. worth. I used the springboard "Where did the soul come from?" and discussed some of the things I was learning in school. I have video of part of the preaching that I'll upload to youtube soon. A woman actually got up on my stool partially drunk to spout her prideful ramblings of why she didn't believe in God. I allowed her to make a fool of herself and just continued preaching. Romans 1 didn't lie when it spoke of humanity. My plan is to go back downtown once or twice before I leave Easter Sunday night.

So I was talking to Travis Friday night and we talked about Tongues and if it was used legitimately today. He told a story that I think I was impressed with. He said he visited a church once where the worship leader "spoke in tongues" and afterward something very interesting and unusual happened. The pastor came up and pointed this out, only to say "here we want to do things biblically" and asked the congregation if anyone had an interpretation. When no one did he turned to the worship leader in love without a hint of anything else and politely asked him to not to do that. Does this suggest the pastor was familiar with it being done biblically? I don't know. I wonder if the pastor was reprimanded for that? I will admit that this is the closest thing I've seen to a biblical representation of the gift of tongues, while it was not done evangelistically as I think Acts suggests. Call me an open Cessationalist... from what I can see... the gift is not normative for today. On the other hand, I would certainly be interested in studying modern churches or observing if the gift was actually practiced biblically.

Last night I was the on the phone with a friend discussing a movie. He thought a major problem in the movie would have been solved if the main character just did one thing. He said he thought the villian was after something and he would stop his attack if he only had that something. I reasoned that the storyline didn't seem to give us that impression or reveal that to us and in fact the clues were somewhat against that theory. I began to put pieces together that made a case that the point of the villian's attack was simply to destroy the main character. This morning it hit me... my friend was interpreting the motive behind the villians' actions and based upon the context of the story and the pieces of the narrative, I interpreted it otherwise. I asked myself this morning... am I observing life the same way I'm observing the Bible? Is all that I'm learning now leaking into my life as I travel through day-to-day events and come across differences of opinion? I tell you... I love Bible college! Thank you Lord for my growth as an expositor and the ready memory of the principles I'm learning!

Finally I wanted to say that I've been praying (if I haven't said already) about if the Lord may want me to be a pastor... but not just that, a missions pastor? I spoke briefly with a professor of mine who was a missions pastor for 9 years. It never occurred to me that one could pastor a flock and in a way be a missionary as well. He said people in other countries have a lot less tools to study the Word than we do here and someone who has had a formal Bible education would have a significant advantage and a significant amount to bring to a people of another country. Immediately my mind dreamed into a future of teaching Hermeneutics and how to study the Bible to people who don't even have a concordance. I could imagine my heart being warmed when they grasp the basic principles of interpretation and Theology and soak up the spiritual milk and meat of the Word. I've always loved to see new believers learn and grow in Christ. Please be with me in prayer as I consider this and seek God's will.

Prayer requests:
-Mormons at the park and Mormon at work
-The seeds sown over break in the hearts of the others at work
-Missions pastor?
-Efficiency and diligence in reading for the remainder of the break